What Happens in the First Therapy Session?

Starting therapy can feel daunting. Even if you’ve thought about it for a long time, that first session often comes with nerves, questions, and a sense of “What am I supposed to do or say?”

If you’re wondering what really happens in a first therapy session, this post is for you.

There’s no test to pass

One of the biggest worries people bring into their first session is the feeling that they need to explain themselves well, say the right things, or arrive with a clear plan.

You don’t.

You’re not expected to tell your life story, have insight, or know where to begin. Many people start with something as simple as “I’m not sure why I’m here, I just know something isn’t right.” That is more than enough.

The session is about getting to know you

A first therapy session can be slower and more exploratory than people expect.

Sometimes though, the relief at finally having the space to talk about what’s going on for you is so releasing, you just spill the whole lot, after just being asked “what’s brought you here today”

Whichever one you are is welcome.

If you struggle to put what’s going on for you into words your therapist may ask some gentle questions about:

• What feels difficult now

• Any past experiences of support or therapy

• What you’re hoping for (even if you’re unsure)

This isn’t an assessment or interrogation. It’s a way of understanding you in context and beginning to build a working relationship.

You’re always free to say if a question feels too much, or if you’d rather not go there yet.

You set the pace

You are in control of how much you share and how quickly you go.

Some people talk a lot and make sense of what’s going on for them by saying it out loud Others are quieter and make sense of stuff on the inside. Some people cry, some people do not; most people at some stage in therapy though will laugh. All these responses are normal. Therapy isn’t about performing or producing something — it’s about creating a space where you can be yourself, however that looks on the day.

There’s no pressure to “go deep” straight away, in face there is no pressure to “go deep” at all.  Therapy is about you finding a space to explore you, at whatever pace feels right for you.

Practicalities and boundaries matter too

Your therapist will usually explain:

• Confidentiality and its limits

• How sessions work

• Fees, cancellations, and boundaries

• How you can raise concerns or questions

These things might feel formal, but they’re actually part of what makes therapy safe. Clear boundaries help create trust.

It’s OK to notice how it feels

The first session isn’t about deciding whether therapy will “fix” everything. It’s more about noticing:

• Did you feel listened to?

• Did you feel respected and at ease?

• Did the space feel safe enough to return to?

It’s also normal to leave feeling tired, emotional, or thoughtful. In fact it is normal to feel anyway you do feel because sometimes you just feel empty. In fact, I often tell people that therapy can be like being with a “Dementor”  everything has been sucked out of you, you feel emotionally drained, but then chocolate, just like with a Dementor, can always help.

And sometimes people feel relieved, lighter – wondering why they hadn’t come to therapy before. Sometimes they are unsure, puzzled, weird even, questioning what they had experienced, what are the feelings they are left with? You don’t have to decide everything immediately and it’s ok to give it a try and decide that now is not the right time.

A final thought

Starting therapy takes courage, even when you’re not sure what you need yet. The first session isn’t about having answers — it’s about opening a conversation.

If you’re curious about therapy but feeling unsure, that uncertainty is welcome too.

Thinking about taking the next step?

If you’re considering therapy and wondering whether Liberty Talking Therapy might be the right fit, you’re welcome to get in touch.

We offer a calm, supportive space where you can talk at your own pace, without pressure to have everything figured out. Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or simply curious about therapy, you don’t need to be in crisis to begin.

You can explore our therapists, ask questions, or book an initial session when it feels right for you.

Sometimes the first step is simply allowing yourself to be heard.